Stupid Werewolves (and a silly human)
by Bunny Fair
Summary: Alice had discovered a few things while being in a relationship with Deucalion and Peter. Individually, they were different. But there were traits that they shared and those traits were absolutely stupid.
1. Chapter 1

Alice had discovered a few things while being in a relationship with Deucalion and Peter. Individually, they were different. But there were traits that they shared and those traits were absolutely _stupid_.

First of all, they both walked too silently. Even though the floors were all hardwood, she never heard them coming. They took great pleasure in sneaking up on her, usually hugging her waist or, in Peter's case, nipping her ear.

Secondly, they were always affectionate. Deucalion was fond of keeping a hand on the back of her neck or her lower back. Peter held her close whenever possible, hugging her waist or pulling her into his lab.

Third, they never got sick. She caught colds and had allergies, but they never picked up anything. They didn't even have to worry about kissing her when she was sick for gods sake! It was so unfair!

And, last of all, they were always so fucking hot! Like, not even physically, they just emitted heat like radiators. And _of course_ they had to hold her between them when they slept at night.

She was pulled from her thoughts as Peter patted her foot, moving her feet to get up. She smiled slightly and nuzzled close to Deucalion, his arm tightening around her. She relaxed as he gently rubbed her neck with his thumb and Peter returrned to his spot, placing her feet in his lap.

She smiled slightly and relaxed, half-heartedly focusing on the tv. Yes, there were many things that annoyed her about them. But those same things made her happy.

Whenever they silently walked up to her, she merely laughed and would only slap their arm before curling into their affections. She loved it when Deucalion's soft scruff (which he rarely allowed to grow out) would rub against her cheek unexpectedly. Even Peter's nipping was enjoyable even if it did lead to more.

She loved how they always hand a hand on her, keeping her grounded and steady. She had absolutely terrible balance and their hands kept her steady. Plus, it made her feel safe, knowing they were always so close. Especially in public, they held her ever so gently.

She actually loved how they never got sick. Mainly so they could tend to her and pamper her. They even allowed her to extend her colds an extra day for more shameless cuddles without any grinding or sexual connotations.

And their body heat was an absolute saving grace. She was typically a little colder than them and even though the apartments were well insulated, it didn't do much to help her. Plus, their combined body heats at night kept her more than warm enough without multiple blankets.

Yes, there were many things about werewolves that should annoy her endlessly. She was also forever jealous of their strength, but she was only human. But, she was their human. Their precious human that they loved so much. She was their mate and they showed it in every little thing they did, from scaring her with surprise kisses to keeping her warm and comfortable at night. She truly couldn't ask for anyone else.


	2. Chapter 2

Deucalion and Peter were comfortably lounging on the couch, Alice dozing between them. Deucalion's arm was around her shoulders, his hand resting on her collarbone and a claw was lazily tracing the dip between them. Peter was half-asleep, his feet propped up as he rested his arms over legs, which were across his lap.

It was truly peaceful. The lights were low, the tv was just low enough for the werewolves to hear it, and their mate was peacefully sleeping. If Deucalion was being honest, though, she slept too often.

He wouldn't say it out loud, but she did like her naps. Leave her alone for longer than a few minutes without proper entertainment and she was out like a light. At least she slept relatively silently.

And to be perfectly blunt, she was always making some sort of noise when she was awake. When she cooked or cleaned, she had to have music playing. Even she was watching a show or movie, she had to comment on something.

She was also always snacking on something, she always had something in her mouth. The poor reusable straws had bite marks littered across them. Even their fingers were often nibbled on, not particularly harsh or even erotic, just a consistent slow 'nom' as she worded it.

He hated to groan, but, ugh, she wiggled so much. She shifted, she squirmed, she wiggled, it was impossible to make her sit still. She was never comfortable and if she was she ended up taking a bloody nap!

He smiled softly and gently rubbed her hip with his thumb. Yes, she did annoy him; at least, in the beginning of the relationship, he honestly thought she was more of an annoyance. But, overtime, her quirks grew on him.

It wasn't honestly too hard to keep her awake, but it was handy for her to nap when he wanted to do work. She was very cuddly while she was awake and while he didn't mind, it did disrupt his work. Plus, it was cute, seeing how she slept in a variety of positions and across various furniture.

The consistent noise wasn't actually a bother, it was actually a bit of a comfort. Her music was a bit annoying, but as long as she kept it down, he had no problem with it playing. She often danced along as well, which he would join in on occasion. Never for her party-type dancing, but he did join for the love songs. And, of course, her commentary was quite interesting.

Her oral fixation was cute, despite the teeth marks and drool. She lazily chewed on pens and marker caps whenever she colored or writing something, and of course her poor straws were a consistent victim. She never bothered his hands whenever he was busy, but it wasn't rare for her to lazily 'nom' on his fingers at night before she dozed off.

Her consistent wiggling wasn't really so bad, either. She was like her brother and had ADHD, but hers was nowhere near as bad as his. He found the best way to get her to still at night to sleep was to lay on top of her, which both weighed her down and left her neck free to scent.

She had endless quirks, like the way she chewed on her lips and nails whenever she was merely bored, or the way she stared at candle flames a little longer than an average person, or even when they went to the store and she had to sniff as many candles possible until her nose burned. Or how instead of asking for help or using a knife, she would bite plastic to tear things open.

Truly, she was a very quirky human, but, she was his quirky human. All of her quirks made her special and unique, and perfectly _her_. And he loved everything about her, even if he didn't say it often.


End file.
